


The Sketchbook

by Maraudererasmut



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Artists, Getting Together, M/M, Marauders, Marauders' Era, Sketches
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-07
Updated: 2018-12-06
Packaged: 2019-09-13 09:17:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,573
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16889811
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Maraudererasmut/pseuds/Maraudererasmut
Summary: Rumus Lupin liked to people watch. Having spent the majority of his life as an outsider, it was easy for him to sit back and observe. His youth had been filled with longing, the burning desire to be a part of something larger than himself, a community. It wasn't until he had picked up a pencil and begun to sketch that Remus realized he could channel his stress into something productive, something creative. He brought his sketchbook everywhere with him, drawing what he saw, staying on the edge of social situations, keeping himself safe on the sidelines. Even after his three dorm mates had befriended him, even after they had accepted him for what he was, Remus still kept drawing. It was something private, something that was his alone, to pour his thoughts and feelings into. His book had become a diary of sorts; an intimate place for him to express himself without the fear of judgement from others.





	The Sketchbook

**Author's Note:**

> I made a post on Tumblr about a little headcanon, and suddenly people wanted me to turn it into a fic!
> 
> This doesn't fit with my "Wolfstar Shorts" canon, so it's a new thing; its own separate entity.
> 
> I hope you enjoy it!
> 
> I am still undecided whether or not this will contain smut in the future... Just sayin'...

Rumus Lupin liked to people watch. Having spent the majority of his life as an outsider, it was easy for him to sit back and observe. His youth had been filled with longing, the burning desire to be a part of something larger than himself, a community. It wasn't until he had picked up a pencil and begun to sketch that Remus realized he could channel his stress into something productive, something creative. He brought his sketchbook everywhere with him, drawing what he saw, staying on the edge of social situations, keeping himself safe on the sidelines. Even after his three dorm mates had befriended him, even after they had accepted him for what he was, Remus still kept drawing. It was something private, something that was his alone, to pour his thoughts and feelings into. His book had become a diary of sorts; an intimate place for him to express himself without the fear of judgement from others.

 

That's why Remus’ book snapped immediately shut whenever one of his friends approached him while he sketched.

 

“Whatcha got there, Moons?” 

 

Remus almost didn't hear Sirius sauntering over to the breakfast table. That was one of the downsides of his friends becoming animagi: they were now significantly better at sneaking up on people.

 

“Nothing,” Remus muttered, tucking his sketchbook into his bag. “You're up early…”

 

“Don't change the subject. It looked like a sketchbook! Do you draw? Can I see?”

 

Remus rolled his eyes as he turned his attention to his coffee. 

 

“No and no.”

 

Remus didn't consider what he did to be drawing. He was a doodler –  an incessant one at that – but he didn't create art. He simply scribbled on a page until he felt like stopping. He hated everything he drew, none if it was particularly good, but he found that his hands fidgeted too much for him to ever be able to stop. 

 

“Well, it looked like you were drawing. Are you saying my eyes were playing tricks on me?” Sirius’ soft grey eyes had a mischievous twinkle in them as he sat down next to his friend, a half-smirk playing at his lips.

 

“Must’ve been.” The werewolf gave a shrug as he purposefully ignored Sirius’ scrutinous gaze. Remus’ shoulders relaxed and a sigh of relief escaped his chest as James and Peter sat down across the table and distracted Padfoot.

 

“Mornin’ boys. You're up early, Pads…”

 

Sirius swept his long hair out of his eyes, the scent of his shampoo wafting through the air, causing Remus’ breath to catch. 

 

“Trouble sleeping. Besides… if I hadn't come down, who would've kept our poor Moony company?” Sirius flashed a grin at Remus, who snorted into his coffee. “Anyway, it's a good thing I was up! Our darling Moony had been keeping a secret from us!”

 

Remus almost spat out the liquid that was in his mouth, resulting in an uncomfortable sputtering and uncontrollable laughter from his friends.

 

“Don't worry, Pads. We already know about Moony's  _ furry little problem _ ,” James chuckled. He glanced up at Remus and noticed the tell-tale reddening of Lupin's ears. 

 

“No, this secret is  _ way _ better, I promise,” Sirius teased, nudging Moony in the ribs with his elbow.

 

“Pads…” Remus was trying to plead with Sirius, hoping beyond hope that his friend would understand that this was something he wanted kept under wraps.

 

“This is a good one, guys. One I bet you'd never guess just by looking at him!” Sirius made an elaborate gesture, as if presenting Remus to the rest of the group.

 

“ _ Padfoot _ …” Remus hissed, desperate for Sirius to stop his taunting and drop the conversation entirely.

 

“Oh?” James’ smirk grew as he decided to play along. “Is he a vampire? I mean, it would make sense. I don't think I've ever seen him sleep, and I'm, like, eighty percent sure he's never eaten garlic.”

 

“No, it's  _ better _ .”

 

“ _ Sirius! _ ” Remus ears began to glow pink as he begged his friend not to continue. Padfoot simply smirked at Moony before turning his attention back to Prongs and Wormtail.

 

“Did you know that our dear Moony is an  _ artist? _ ” 

 

“No way! That's awesome, Remus! Show us!”

 

James was always enthusiastic when it came to his friends, and this was no exception. He smiled supportively at Lupin, trying to keep his expression warm as opposed to insanely curious.

 

“I'm not an artist. I just… I doodle sometimes.” Remus was muttering his words into his cereal, avoiding meeting the two pairs of eyes that eagerly stared at him from across the table.

 

“Well, come on then, Moons. Share with the rest of the class!” Sirius tried to reach for Remus’ rucksack, but was met by an abrupt punch to the arm. Moony was strong when he needed to be.

 

“Bugger off, Padfoot.” James and Peter laughed joyously as Remus stood up from his seat and swung his bag over his shoulder. “I'm gonna head to Transfig early. I have a few things to ask McGonagall anyway.”

 

Sirius let out a little whine as Remus walked away from the table. He looked at James, who was still sniggering behind his hand.

 

“Think I made him mad?”

 

James shrugged his shoulders before pulling a basket of toast toward himself.

 

“Iunno. Even if you did, it's Moony. He's never mad for long.” 

 

Prongs shoved a slice of bread in his mouth before reaching across Peter to snatch the marmalade away from a first year. Sirius was too distracted by his thoughts to bother laughing as bickering broke out across the table. Why would Remus hide his talent from his friends? What was in that sketchbook that Moony wanted to keep secret?

  
  


\---

 

When Sirius arrived at the Transfiguration classroom, he made a beeline to the front, grabbing the seat right next to Remus, where Peter usually sat. It wasn't unusual for the Marauders to swap around their seats, but Peter was particularly adamant that he sit beside Remus for McGonagall's class, considering his tendency to slack off and require extra help. When Prongs and Wormtail walked into class, they noticed the change immediately. James gave Sirius a peculiar look while Peter let out an aggravated grimace.

 

“Pads! I can't sit beside Prongs! His handwriting's illegible!”

 

“Yeah,” James agreed, nodding his head. “We all know Peter won't be able to read my notes. What's up with you?”

 

Sirius shrugged his shoulders and leaned back in his chair, balancing it carefully on two legs.

 

“Iunno. Guess I wanted a change for once…”

 

“It's 'cause he wants to see what's in my sketchbook,” Remus muttered, not taking his eyes off the chalk that was now magically writing the lesson plan on the board. Sirius forced a laugh, hoping that the boys would see just how preposterous that idea was. Sirius didn't want anyone to think that he cared about what Moony was drawing. He didn't, after all. Not even a little bit.

 

“C'mon, Pads. Lay off Moony. Remus, if you don't want to share with us, that's fine.”

 

“ _ Thank _ you, Prongs. At least somebody understands the meaning of privacy.” Remus didn't realize that his friend wasn't finished.

 

“If Moony wants to keep a secret diary from us with all of his hopes and dreams, who are we to judge?” James flashed Sirius a grin before running a hand through his own hair. 

 

“Sod  _ off _ , Prongs.” Remus was starting to get tired of his friends’ constant prying. He was suddenly very happy that he chose to leave his sketchbook in his trunk upstairs.

 

It was true, after all. Remus poured himself into each of his drawings, focusing on whatever was on his mind. Normally, Lupin wouldn't care that his friends wanted to see his doodles; he would have been more than happy to appease them just to get them off his case. Unfortunately, the things that had been on his mind recently were not the types of thoughts he could share with the Marauders. If Padfoot had seen anything in Remus’ book, the werewolf would have been mortified: the book was almost entirely filled with drawings of Sirius.

 

Sometimes, when Sirius sat across the room, joking and laughing with James, Remus would feel a tightness in his chest. He'd immediately grab his book and draw, rough broad strokes showing passion and frustration. The scratching of a pencil tip over textured paper, the way the graphite smudged beneath his hand while scribbling, had become therapeutic for Lupin. It was the only way to keep himself together some days. There was something about Sirius that made Remus’ heart skip a beat, and his doodles kept him from doing anything rash.

 

Sirius’ eyes and the sadness they always showed, despite how hard he tried to hide it. His chiseled jawline and sharp cheekbones, that caused light and shadow to play off the contours of his face. The way his lips parted ever so slightly whenever he was lost in thought, the curve of them, their delicate slopes and gentle curves... Drawing Sirius was the easiest thing in the world. 

 

“Mr. Black, considering your grades in this course, it would do you some good to pay attention to the lesson!”

 

Remus was pulled away from his thoughts by Professor McGonagall scolding Sirius, who was still leaning back in his chair and chatting with James.

 

“Sorry Minnie,” he quipped. “Got distracted by  _ this _ handsome bloke!”

 

“Ten points from Gryffindor. The next smug retort out of you will land you in detention, Black.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> To be continued...


End file.
